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April 1, 2011
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She wakes up in the late afternoon
and all she wants to do is dream so she won't be conscious.

She lays in a puddle
and feels like she's falling
into a sea of hope
where she's used to falling asleep with no one but you on her mind.
:iconfallaparttohalftime:
'Hell has the good music full of rock and roll. Heaven just has the choreographers.'' -Joel Madden.
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:iconshoopdawhoop234:
~shoopdawhoop234 Sep 18, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
plusplz
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:iconshoopdawhoop234:
Mood: Neutral ~shoopdawhoop234 Sep 18, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
it's funny when i see this
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:iconwish-sticks:
oh also, "drowning into" doesn't make sense

maybe make a line break of one word like falling, or capsizing?
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:iconwish-sticks:
I liked everything but the last stanza, the sea part just seemed overdone a tad.

That said,

I'm used to falling asleep with no one but you on my mind. :heart:
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:iconfallaparttohalftime:
~FallApartToHalftime Apr 1, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
i just changed it around, thanks for the advice. :XD:
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:iconwish-sticks:
Thanks for accepting it!
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:iconfallaparttohalftime:
~FallApartToHalftime Apr 1, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
your welcome, thanks for the advice. <3
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:icontypicaltazn:
~TypicalTAzn Apr 1, 2011  Student Digital Artist
Yeah... Those 'What If' Dreams right? ):
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:iconfallaparttohalftime:
~FallApartToHalftime Apr 1, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
:heart: gotta love 'em. <3
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